Embracing Body Positivity: Rachel Levin’s Journey to Healthy Eating and Self-Acceptance at Midlife

Have you ever felt trapped in the cycle of dieting, battling negative thoughts about your body, and struggling to find peace with food? You’re not alone. Join host Heather Carey in this enlightening episode of Real Food Stories as she chats with Rachel Levin, a health and fitness coach whose transformative journey from body image struggles to body positivity will inspire you to rethink your relationship with food and yourself.

Rachel, the author of The Donut Diaries, shares her candid account of over 30 years spent chasing thinness and the toll it took on her mental and physical health. At age 40, feeling “sick and tired” of self-sabotage, she embarked on a path of self-discovery that led her to embrace body positivity and advocate for a healthier mindset. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of how to cultivate compassion and kindness towards oneself, especially during midlife when hormonal changes can complicate our relationship with food.

Throughout their conversation, Heather and Rachel delve into the importance of understanding one’s food beliefs and the profound impact of childhood experiences on eating habits. They discuss how societal pressures and food fads often perpetuate myths about weight loss and healthy eating, and how embracing a mindful eating approach can pave the way for sustainable wellness. Rachel emphasizes that diets are often unsustainable and encourages listeners to learn to listen to their bodies instead.

With valuable insights on nutrition and health, Rachel’s journey reflects the struggles many women face, particularly during menopause. She touches on the seven pillars of abundance that can empower women to make informed choices about their health and well-being. This episode offers practical nutrition advice, healthy eating tips, and cooking techniques that resonate with anyone looking to improve their relationship with food.

Join us for this empowering discussion that not only tackles the myths surrounding weight loss journeys but also celebrates the beauty of personal food stories and the richness of food and culture. Discover how to navigate the complexities of emotional eating, family food influences, and the importance of culinary wellness in your daily life. Together, we can embrace midlife body positivity and create a healthier, happier relationship with food that lasts a lifetime.

Don’t miss out on this inspiring episode filled with compassion, understanding, and the tools you need to embark on your own personal food journey. Tune in to Real Food Stories and take the first step towards a more empowered and fulfilling life!

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Transcript:

Speaker #0
Well, hello, everybody, and welcome back. And if you are just tuning in with me for the very first time, it’s so nice to meet you. And I’m really glad you’re here with me today. I am your host, Heather Carey, nutritionist, chef, mom, and a woman who has been around the block with food. I want to open up about real food in relation to health, weight, and our bodies so you can make peace with what you eat. I recently had the privilege to have a conversation with Rachel Levin, who is a health and fitness coach and most importantly, also the author of the book, The Donut Diaries. Rachel has her own very personal story around body image and weight and diets and the obsession with being thin and wanting to just make peace with food. And she now… takes all the information that she has imparted into her book and teaches women through one-on-one coaching and group coaching how to also make peace with their bodies. So please take a listen to this very important and in-depth conversation with

Speaker #1
Rachel Lavin. For over 20 years, Rachel Lavin has been a certified personal trainer, certified health coach, professional speaker,

Speaker #0
and body love educator. In 2020, Rachel wrote her first book, The Donut Diaries, about her own struggles with her weight and restrictive diets, which lasted for over 30 years. As Rachel turned 40, the expression, I got sick and tired of being sick and tired, really hit home. And she decided to take her power back in order to heal from decades of negative thinking and self-sabotage. Rachel began to do the work on her mind, body, and soul. Writing her book was her way of sharing her message to women and men alike to tell them that you are not alone. Now using her book, Rachel wants to help people who have had or are still experiencing negative body image. By using what she now refers to as her three pillars of fitness, nourishment, or both the mind and body, movement, and rest. Rachel’s mission has been to create a safe space for all women to feel whole in their own body. So welcome, Rachel. I’m so glad you’re joining me today because I know that we have so much in common and a lot to talk about. I have my own personal story of growing up on and off of diets and very poor self-body image when I was younger. And now as a nutritionist, I know firsthand the detriments of negative thinking. And that’s self-sabotage. I get it from my clients all the time. So let’s jump into your story. Tell me about you, what got you to write your book, The Donut Diaries. I love the title. And we’ll go from there.

Speaker #1
Well, first I want to say hello and thank you so much for having me, Heather. This is such a pleasure. And to answer your question, you said it pretty well in the intro. I lived my life for. uh most the better part of 40 years always on a diet always thinking about my body always thinking about the food i was or wasn’t eating it was just a complete and utter uh what’s the word i’m looking for i’m sorry it was just it took over my life it was something that i i woke up thinking about went to bed thinking about and who knows how many times during the day thought about and so when i decided to write my book i was at that point where I said to myself, there’s got to be more to life than this, right? There’s more to me than my body. So there has to be more to life than stressing about this and obsessing about this. And when I wrote it, my message was, and I write this throughout my book the whole time, is that I wanted you to know, my readers, that you’re not alone. Because I think so many times I felt that way. I felt so alone. only I feel this way or only I, and I know that that’s not true. So I really wanted to bridge that gap between me and all the other women out there.

Speaker #0
Yeah. I think knowing that you are not alone is so empowering. And it’s the reason why I even started my podcast. It’s the reason why I’m so forthcoming with my stories too, that And feeling like you are alone, especially in the world of dieting and body image and women. I mean, we are just, yeah, it’s, it can be very shaming, right? We can feel like ashamed and, and I’m the only one feeling like this. And, you know, then we’ve got social media to contend with and, you know, it’s, it’s just can be really punishing. So I think your message of, you know, we are not alone is really powerful. Tell me about You know, you said you were always on a diet for 40 years. You know, I’m a big believer in talking about our food stories just stemming from childhood. I think that this starts right from somewhere. Like we have got some foundation in our childhood. Tell me a little more about that. Do you have a story around just growing up?

Speaker #1
Absolutely. I grew up in the 80s and 90s. So both my parents worked. I’m sure your listeners have heard that. term latchkey kid. That means you come home from school and you’re by yourself for a chunk of hours before the parents come home. And I can not remember a time where my snack or my lunch or my dinner didn’t come out of a package or a box or it was microwavable or just all those fun things that we used to eat. And so that was my relationship with food. It was easy. It was simple. It was done for me and I didn’t think about the ingredients that were or weren’t in these foods. I just realized, I just knew that in three to five minutes, I could have my dinner. And even though I was putting all this poison into my body, it wasn’t resonating until I was out on my own. And then I had to go to the grocery store and I had no… idea what to do. I didn’t really know how to cook. And I didn’t learn how to cook until I was about 37 years old. And that’s no lie. And now I don’t want your listeners to think I never eat anything out of a bag or a box because I do.

Speaker #0
Of course,

Speaker #1
it’s most of my food source comes from whole ingredients, which I prepare myself. And I have Maybe it was a blessing I learned a little bit later in life, because now it’s just such a joy for me to cook my own food and to sit down and eat something that I’ve prepared. So that was how I started with food. It was all processed.

Speaker #0
Do you feel like your parents, was this a way to ease maybe their guilt about leaving you alone? You know, here’s some fun, fast food, you know, comfort or was it? We’re too busy here. You’re fend for yourself. And here’s the, you know, was your mother ever cooking or, you know, was there any cooking going on in the, you know, in your family?

Speaker #1
There was cooking. It was mainly done on the weekends where we would have homemade food. But during the week, you know, both my parents, like I said, they worked and they worked long hours. So they would come home and we would have. Or maybe it was a crockpot situation. My mom, you know, I still love my mom’s chili. And so that would be a definite staple in my life. And I’m not sure if it was a guilt. I just know that it was, you know, the time they had to spend at work versus the time they had to spend at home. It’s like, well, where can we make that easier? And I just don’t think I personally had any interest in cooking. So it’s not like I ever offered to help out. I mean, it was just, it just wasn’t a. thought when I was a teenager.

Speaker #0
Yeah, well, it was a fast food 80s. I mean, right, that it was that was just a big part of the culture, you know, the grab and go, you know,

Speaker #1
MasterChef Junior now like these little eight year olds are creating like these three course dinners. And I was like,

Speaker #0
right,

Speaker #1
where did that come from?

Speaker #0
Right? Well, you know, I always say unless you were growing, you grew up with like, your grandma, like making soup in the kitchen, and, you know, or your mom, or, you know, it’s really. It’s hard to learn, you know, unless you were raised with that. And it sounds like your parents were just two very busy working parents. Now, did you what you know, with me growing up, there was absolutely a culture of you start dieting. Like once I turned like, you know, I my body was changing. I was about 11 years old. There was definitely a underlying belief that like, you know, the dieting starts now. you know, I was getting a little, little, I was just filling out and, and I was getting this from both sides from my father and my mother, you know, like, my mom is just go, go on a diet, you might want to try a diet, even though I was not overweight, I was just filling out. And so that’s where my you know, my experience with like, Oh, I better start, I better start, um, hating my body almost and, and, and fixing it. What about you? Cause you, I mean, I know you said you were on diets for your entire life that did it. Did that dieting culture start for you back then?

Speaker #1
Yes. Cause I relate to you exactly. And I remember, you know, in the fifth grade, I was getting boobs. I started my period. I was developing before a lot of the other girls. So I relate to you when you say that big time. So I think having those things happen to me early made me so hyper aware of my body. And I just looked different than other girls. So I just that’s when for me, I know the fifth, sixth grade is when I was always like this, my body, my body, my body. And it just propelled into this thing as I kept going into junior high school and high school and then became a young woman. And it’s, I. just don’t remember trying, not trying to change my body, or I don’t remember not thinking about my body at some point during the day, every day.

Speaker #0
I agree with you. I was the same. I developed very early, you know, very early on in my period, very early. And so, and I had two sisters who were like string beans, you know, like they’re, they’re very thin, like never had a, you know, any kind of an issue around weight or anything. And I, yeah, I was just very different physically. And so, yeah, that definitely set the tone. And, you know, in my family, there was just an overarching feeling, you know, it’s just women weren’t supposed to enjoy food. You know, we were like supposed to like, not like the men could enjoy food. You know, we were not supposed to like it. We were supposed to always be like, I’ll have a little of that, maybe not this or. So again, I think that the dieting mindset comes from somewhere. I mean, certainly from like even friends or, but I remember my mother handing me a magazine, you know, with some kind of a diet in it. I think I lasted for like two days. So I was starving to death. But that was my first, you know, entry into, into dieting and not supposed to really love our bodies, you know, we’re supposed to try to fix them.

Speaker #1
Well, that was like you said, that was definitely the time where every week on the TV, there was some actress who was like putting her diet and workout routine in the magazine. And, you know, that’s what we were all reading, you know, InStyle magazine or People or whatever it was. But that was just that was for a woman or a young girl. That was what we were paying attention to. So that was our social media before social media. I can’t even imagine. what it’s like for a young girl now with all the TikTok videos and all. I just, I can’t imagine. I just can’t.

Speaker #0
I think now it’s movement of, you know, what we call orthorexia, you know, eating, clean eating, eating perfectly. I’ve seen girls come in and under the guise of I’m vegan, you know, so that’s so vegan to me signals. right. I’m not really eating. I’m very picky with my eating and yeah. And you know, some girls who won’t even like touch food unless it’s like, you know, clean and pristine and it’s yeah. So that’s almost like the new sort of dieting, but you know, and then for women, the women who are my age or in your age who then grew up like doing those diets, you know, the diets don’t end. I mean, it’s, if when you’re used to being on diets, on the diet. off the diet, you know, you’re, you’re good on the diet, you’re losing some weight, then you I mean, it’s they’re impossible to maintain so that you go off the diet and you gain weight back, you get into a cycle of not knowing how to eat, unless you are on the diet. You know, and, you know, there’s no just middle ground of eating and enjoying food.

Speaker #1
Oh, my God, that’s so true.

Speaker #0
Yeah. So, I mean, there’s, right. And so I, I see women still to this day who are just, they don’t know how to eat without being on a diet. And I do not obviously subscribe to people because it’s because I know how punishing they are and how, you know, and losing weight, gaining weight back. And do you have a history of doing that? You know, just being on the diet off the diet. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

Speaker #1
I mean, talk about that in my book, how I have literally been a size zero, size 12, and everything in between. I, you know, would restrict, restrict, restrict. And I love to tell people, you know, I love to talk about this. And I say, absolutely every diet works. in the beginning because they do right you’re changing something about your consumption or what you’re concerned so your body responds in kind but then your body wisens up and says what are you doing to me and that’s where plateaus come from people complain about plateau i’m not losing any more weight or i’m gaining weight back and it’s like because your body is starving or it’s in you’re you’re not letting it just be and so that’s what i try for you to you try to tell your clients and the women in your life. It’s like, if you just stop all this yo-yo dieting and just eat a regular whole diet, your body will adjust. And I mean, we all have that set point. I’m sure. Do you agree with that about our set point?

Speaker #0
Yeah. Yes, I do.

Speaker #1
Yeah. So if spending years and years and years on diets, our body is completely confused. And so it needs time to reset, to find what that set point is. now that I have stopped dieting, I mean, really stopped dieting since about 2018, I still feel like my body is trying to find homeostasis. It takes that long.

Speaker #0
Yes, absolutely. Yeah. I think you get to a point where like, you could like be losing some weight, but then you start getting into like struggle with it. And you’re like, all right, this is where my body wants to land. And that’s, you know, and that’s okay. And then as you get older, or we throw in. perimenopause and hormones. So like, then that’s a whole other, a whole other change and a whole other, you know, I don’t want to say battle with your body, but it is, you know, it just throws another like monkey wrench into it. But yeah, I, you know, I tell my clients a lot. I mean, like anyone can be on a diet. You can tough it out for 30 days, right? Anyone can focus in, tough it out. You can lose, you know, the 30 pounds in 30 days if you want to. But if you can’t maintain that, that is a diet. And that is not sustainable. It’s soul killing. It really does a number on your self-esteem, your body image, your what’s wrong with me, how come I can’t do it. And then you’re chasing it. And then you blow it, you gain the weight back, and then you’re chasing after the next diet. So it’s just a cycle that sometimes never ends. And it sounds like you said, you know, I learned how to cook. not so long ago and you’re embracing cooking and everything more. And, you know, that’s another thing I think with diets don’t really don’t lend to just overall healthy cooking. I mean, they tell you what to eat, you know, again, everyone can like, just here, let me follow that plan. And like, but it takes the intuition out of cooking. It takes the feeling of like, what do I feel like eating today? What am I in the mood for? And, but cooking is so important. I mean, it is so vital to our health and our weight, right? Because the more we’re cooking at home, the more we’re using just our own ingredients and we know exactly what’s going into our food.

Speaker #1
Yes, absolutely.

Speaker #0
So how did you learn how to cook? I mean, how did you jump into that?

Speaker #1
Well, that’s a fun story. I had been forced to join a 90 day challenge at my gym that I was working at in New York City. I was at my heaviest weight up to that point. And I just felt like I’ve been on every diet already. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to eat. What am I supposed to live on salads for the rest? I mean, I was really just at my wits end. And at the time, the manager, my fitness manager at the gym. introduced me to his then wife and she was a anti-inflammatory nutritionist. I had never heard that term before. And I had already been in the fitness industry for what, 15 years. Long story short, we met, she says, I’m going to put you on my meal plan. I’ll send you the menu. I don’t know where the disconnect was, but I was like, okay, here we go again, a diet. I’ll go buy the food. So I thought it was just going to be the same thing. And so I get the thing and she’s, and here’s a list of ingredients. And I remember calling her up and saying, Hey, Lynn, where you don’t have the place where I buy this on the, I, there’s like literally the longest silence I’ve ever heard. And she said, yeah, go to the store, you buy it. And then you take it home and you make it.

Speaker #0
Oh, it’s not like mail order or like shakes. It’s like you actually, right. It’s called the grocery store.

Speaker #1
And so I said, oh, I said, well, I don’t do that. I said, I’ll buy it. And then she’s like, well, you’re gonna today. And she, I mean, she was like a total New Yorker. She’s like, you’re going to do this or you’re not going to do it. I don’t care. But this is how I work. And so I remember just standing in Whole Foods, feeling like Whole Foods was spinning. And like, I just, I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know where I was. It was just so crazy. And that was literally my introduction into grocery shopping and cooking. And I went home and I laid all this stuff out. And I mean, it was an all day event. And there was tears for sure. But now I, I love it. Now I’m like, oh. this a tablespoon of this and a pinch of this oh i got this you know and but it’s taken a long time it’s taken a long time but i would not change it for the world because it definitely helped this person grow into a self-sufficient adult so right yeah

Speaker #0
i mean listen if you don’t know how to cook or even grocery shopping can feel overwhelming i mean i talk to my clients all the time, like about mindful grocery shopping, go in with a list. I mean, don’t. you know, don’t wonder like aimlessly, like, what am I supposed to have for dinner tonight? Like, don’t do that. Like go in with a plan, a list, you know, know what, yeah. Know what you’re like shopping, you know, what, know what’s going in your cart. And, but it can be overwhelming, especially if you don’t really know how to cook. So that sounds like that was some maybe divine intervention that you met her and how did it turn out? This is a 90 day challenge you were on?

Speaker #1
No, no, no. The gym, I was doing a 90 day challenge at the gym. Her meal plan, it’s so, it was a 30 day menu. I don’t even like to call it. I mean, it was a menu. So literally for 30 days, it was different recipes that I had to grocery shop and cook for. And I learned how to cook so many different things. I learned how to cook vegetarian dishes. I learned how to cook, you know, meat dishes. I found out very early on in her plan that I would never survive as a vegan because meat, you know, that protein, it just satiates me and makes me feel good. So I learned so many things about how my body works and how and why we get inflamed and how you can take care of that. I learned a lot of stuff from that plan. So I’m so grateful for that.

Speaker #0
That sounds fantastic. Yeah. Because I think getting, you know, we need to be educated on how to eat. Mm hmm. Rather than just being handed a diet, which so many people just do, they have they’re like disconnected. Right. They’re just like as long as they follow the diet. But we need a food education. We need to know exactly what like what a balanced plate looks like and what you know, what it what it means to eat, to feel energized and good.

Speaker #1
Mm hmm.

Speaker #0
And so it sounds like that that really did help you.

Speaker #1
Yeah, for sure. And now all these years later, do I follow it meticulously? Of course not. I kept some staples that I know make me feel good. And if I do eat something that causes some, and this is what I love that I learned more than anything. Inflammation can be temporary. It could be something that you ate. And I’m sure you talk to your clients about this all the time. It doesn’t mean everything is lost. It doesn’t mean that it doesn’t mean you have to get down on yourself. You ate something that did not agree with your body. And here’s some things you can do to alleviate that. And now, you know, for me, I, I’m not a fan of the pepper family. It just doesn’t, it just doesn’t do well with my tummy. So I don’t really cook with peppers. And if there is something, and I just kind of pick them out because I don’t want to be uncomfortable. It’s not about, I don’t like that. I may have this response to my body. And I don’t feel like being uncomfortable. I don’t feel like being bloated or having a tummy ache. So I don’t eat those things. There are so many other beautiful vegetables that make me feel great that I just, I, you know, lean more towards those.

Speaker #0
Yeah. You’re tuning into your body and you know what works and what doesn’t work. And right. And I think that’s a great point too, is that, okay, who cares if you don’t agree with peppers, there’s a thousand other vegetables. It doesn’t mean like, oh, all is lost. I can’t eat vegetables. And so speaking of that. You’re not gonna eat peppers. That’s okay. Because there’s so many other great fruits and vegetables to eat, right? So if you were, you know, back to your younger self, if you had, you know, maybe some of these skills now, like the cooking and everything, I mean, thinking back, you know, because, you know, when you just open the package and you heat food up and, you know, your parents are very busy, of course, and everything. Is there something you would tell your younger self now? Like just looking back or? Even even when in regards to being on diets and I mean, even, you know, not even just your younger self, it sounds like you were like on really on diets up until not so long ago.

Speaker #1
I would definitely tell my younger self to just be gentle with myself. You know, I just think that. If I couldn’t get something right the first time, I would just say, I’m not good at this or I can’t do this. So if I would have screwed up a recipe, I would have probably never tried again because I just felt like I should have gotten it right then and there. And I would also tell myself that your body is perfect the way it is and you don’t have to torture it.

Speaker #0
Yeah. I mean, right. And I think I would have definitely told my younger self, too, that. I don’t have to listen to anybody. I really felt, I have very good memories of being even like younger than 11 and just really enjoying food, you know, because I was, I think I was more allowed to in my family. And, you know, then there was like this like crossroads from like, you know, you’re like an adult now, so, or young adults. And yeah, I wish that, you know, looking back, I had, could have spoken to myself a little bit more and said like, you know, ignore the like. those big influences, those big, you know, adult influences and society in general, and just love yourself, you know, as you are, you’re okay as you are. It’d be nice if we could go back and, you know, but we can do it now. I mean, you know, just, we could even just work on ourselves even now, kind of forgive that time in our lives and, and then look at it with some compassion.

Speaker #1
Absolutely. I mean, listen, that I love that expression. It’s never too late because it’s not. Now I can go through a whole day and there’s nothing but kindness that comes across to myself and to other women. I mean, that for me is such a big, important part of it, too. You can’t expect the kindness to just sit with you. You’ve got to spread it. So I definitely can have days or, you know, let’s go back, minutes, seconds, days, weeks where I don’t have one negative thought about myself or my body. And then one. it happened. But now I’m so grateful for that shift in my mindset and that arsenal of beautiful things that I’m, I am capable of saying to myself. And I think the interesting thing is now that I believe it. And the minute that I start to say something negative about my body, I’m able to say you’re feeling like this because of whatever reason. And I don’t let my brain go crazy the So I’m sure you agree with this. It’s like That’s where part of the problem was, is that those thoughts would just spiral and literally ruin your day because you saw your reflection and you didn’t like the way your body looked or whatever it was that we used to feel about our body. And I think that is so important to share with women. It is a mindset. It is a mindset change, but you can do it.

Speaker #0
I am with you. I mean, I spent my entire life just even as a nutritionist, as a healthy food chef, I spent years just beating myself up and, you know, I had my kids and I was pretty big emotional eater, you know, from, I mean, I learned that too, when I was young, food is love, you know, food is comfort. So when I had my kids and I was overwhelmed with my career and juggling three really young kids at the same time, and I was just like peaking in emotional eating and I knew better, you know, I knew like I knew how to eat, but I was still doing it. But I think you know, what I didn’t learn when I went to school to get my master’s degree in nutrition is this piece of it. I mean, I could tell people how to like, how many fat grams to, you know, and carbs and all that stuff, but the kindness, compassion, the mindfulness, the, all of those other habits and skills were completely missing. And until I did that with myself and I really embraced it fully with myself, I couldn’t really, that’s when I, that’s when my whole like practice like shifted because I couldn’t, I didn’t, I didn’t know that key, key component. I ended up losing some weight. I’d been holding on to like baby weight and everything. And I lost, I lost the weight, but I could never have done it without the kindness and compassion piece. And I certainly, yeah. And I certainly have days when I’m like, you know, it can be a little hard on myself, but it’s, it’s not the norm at all. So it sounds like the same for you. I mean that, right. But right. So spending years beating on yourself and just trying to beat yourself into submission is goes absolutely nowhere.

Speaker #1
And what you said about emotional eating, I know that’s super real. But for me, I was more angry at my hunger. I didn’t want to be hungry. And maybe that is emotional eating. I don’t know. But I would try to to not eat for as long as I could. And then I would just like Hoover everything.

Speaker #0
You know,

Speaker #1
yeah. Yeah.

Speaker #0
Yeah. And when you’re starving, you don’t make.Great choice, right? I mean, you just need to get food into your brain is like, feed me now. So you’re not making…

Speaker #1
I just know one thing is super important that I had to learn about myself that I am not one of those, oh, let’s eat three meals a day and live. No, no. I need to pay attention to my hugger signals. And some days I can just go eat breakfast, lunch and dinner. But then there’s some days where I need like three snacks. So I’m sure that is… alarming to a lot of people who feel like it needs to be regimented. But I think it’s important to understand that just like you change and evolve as a person, so do your nutritional needs. And not every day or every year is going to be the same. And just to embrace that and be okay with it.

Speaker #0
Exactly. Right. And I think when I see women, they come to me, they’re like, okay, so tell me what to just tell me what to eat. Okay, so breakfast, like, so a midday, I’m like, If you want, I don’t know, like for me, right. I’m a big, like breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I’m not, I rarely eat snacks. It’s not for, because I’m telling myself you can’t eat snacks. It’s just because I’m not hungry. I’m not, I’m really fine. Like filling up on like breakfast, lunch, and dinner. That’s okay. You’re, you know, but have there been days when I’m like in the afternoon, I want a snack. Of course. I’m so tuned in with my body now though. And like really checking in, you know, for me, I. it’s like I said, there’s like physical hunger, right? And there’s emotional hunger. And so I’m, you know, I teach people that too, is like just tuning into like, are you emotionally, are you just having a bad day? Did you just eat an hour ago? And now you want to eat a half a gallon of ice cream, you know, because that’s probably emotional hunger, you know, versus like really, really tuning in and seeing, are you physically hungry? And if you’re physically hungry, honor that hunger and eat. Do not, right? Right. Do not get to that. Like, I’m just going to push my hunger away and, and then, you know, eat all the things in front of me because I am like starving to death. Yeah. So it sounds like you really started to get a handle on, on identifying what your hunger was and, and eating according to how you feel that day, which is totally fine. That’s how we should be eating. Not according to somebody else’s plan. Right. So, I mean, so tell me about your, the book that you wrote, which I love the title, by the way, but the donut diaries, just talk to me more about that. What, you know, did it, I mean, it sounds like it came out of your experiences.

Speaker #1
So my book is, is really me telling you my story of what we’ve been talking about together so far. It was how I started noticing that I was developing younger and how I noticed my body and then how I started dieting. So I’m really sharing my journey of where that whole 41st years of just like feeling betrayed by my body, just always thinking I have to be on a diet, but also sharing how I was fortunate enough to be able to move my body in any way that I wanted to at the time. Like I share, I was a swimmer, I was an ice skater. And then it just seemed normal and natural for me to go into the fitness professional. professionally. And I share my ups, my downs. And, but I, I really tried to tell my story in a way like, Hey, here’s my story. Here’s what I went through. And I’m sure that you’re right there with me and you’re not alone. And I definitely did not tailor my book as a self-help book. And don’t get me wrong. I think they’re so helpful. And I love there’s many out there. I love. But I wanted my book to be like you were sitting on my couch and we were just talking about it. So I’ve heard that from people who have read it, that that’s what they got from it. And so that makes me very, very happy. But I also talk about how not only did I have all these wins and did I have all this weight loss, but I also gained it all back many times. And I didn’t realize for years and years and years I wanted to write a book about, oh, Rachel kept. the weight off and she’s living her best life. And then the weight would come back. So I was like, well, I can’t do that.

Speaker #0
Right.

Speaker #1
And I realized how important it was to write about those failures and be relatable because that’s where we all, that’s where we live when it comes to diet culture, right? We have that significant weight loss and then it comes back, weight loss comes back. So during 2020, when we had all kinds of time, I realized how important it was to write about. maybe even more important to write about my failures than my wins.

Speaker #0
I think that’s really important. Yeah, because when someone’s on a diet, you’re like, oh, did you hear about so-and-so’s aunt? You know, she lost 30 pounds on the such-and-such diet. But then rarely do you hear about the 30 pounds that they gained back and that they’re feeling ashamed about and like, what’s wrong with a failure? What’s wrong with me? How come I can’t keep up with the diet? And, you know, and we just I think we live in these. Our society is like we live in an impossibly high standard for body image. When we’re all good and at our best, let’s show it off on social media. And then when we’ve gained the weight back, let’s go crawl under a rock and hang our head in shame. So when you were having those failures, when you gained the weight back, what was happening with you?

Speaker #1
Well, I realize now that my body is, I need, well, we’re all of our bodies are made to move, but I’m just speaking for myself. I have to move my body to feel good, to feel energetic, to feel all those good things. If I don’t work out, I become very cranky and lethargic and the weight comes on. It’s just how I’m built. So I’ve accepted that. And I hope that comes across as an acceptance more and not as a put down because I don’t see it that way anymore. It’s just learning. It’s just learning about myself. And so I’ve learned how to move my body. That makes Rachel feel good. I’ve learned how to eat that makes Rachel feel good. And my body responds nicely by, you know, staying at a weight that I’m happy with or, you know, gaining muscle and not losing that muscle. So… That’s what I’ve done in the past 11 years. So 40 was kind of like my turning point. And then now here we are at 51 and just doing my best every day. I don’t have a goal weight in mind. I don’t have a size of clothing in mind. My closet is full of things from small to extra large. So whatever fits me that day, great.

Speaker #0
Right. So it sounds like you really got, I mean, diets are made for like. it’s like a one size fit all, right? But we are so individual and our metabolisms are everything. It’s just individual. You said you feel at your best when you’re moving more or you know that having too much sodium and you know, is just, or you don’t like peppers or, I mean, it’s right. We’re all just have our own individual bodies. And that is a bonus because then we can really. form, you know, how we’re going to live our lives with, with this body and love our bodies and just, you know, appreciate that we are, you know, what we need and what, and what we have and listen to our intuition. Like just really listen. I mean, listen to us, your body love concept. Tell me more about that. I mean, which sounds. I know what we’ve just been talking about, but tell me just a little bit more about that. Is this something that you bring up in your book? Is it different than what we’ve been addressing?

Speaker #1
I want to say yes to your last question. Because listen, we’ve grown up, even you and I in the 80s and 90s, there was a touch, a tiny touch on body positivity, right? Or having a bigger body and being big and beautiful and plus size, blah, But then it went away. It went away. And now it’s back and it’s back with a vengeance. And I’m so happy about that. But I’ve also learned from back then to now, you can say words like body positivity. You can say body neutrality. You can use whatever buzz word that you want to describe. Hello, we all come in different shapes and sizes. And, but for me, I could never have. gotten to where I am today from that person back then without loving learning to love myself. So that’s why I focus on body love. And I’m sure you’re going to find somebody who thinks that’s dumb, too. I don’t know. But I am just putting out in the world what works for me. And hopefully you’ll resonate with that and learn to love yourself, too, because that’s where it starts.

Speaker #0
Yeah, well, I mean, I think I said before that there was no way that I could have lost any weight or gotten myself more in shape without that body love, you know, concept of just feeling like I love and appreciate my own body. I mean, I have no doubt in my mind and, and it’s what I definitely try to impart onto my clients. Now everyone comes in with their own food story, their stories around food, their stories around diets, their stories around body image. I love the concept of body love. And I think it’s definitely a work in progress.

Speaker #1
And I know that with women like myself and you and you know, the beautiful women I’ve aligned myself with. We’re not. going to let it go away this time. You know, there’s no reason why we have to spend another two decades feeling like we have to aspire to that size zero body if that’s just not how we’re built. So I think that that’s where the change is and the difference is that there’s too many women who are being real loud and proud about it. So I love that. I have a six week and a 12 week program based on my book. So each chapter gets, you know, one to two weeks. We talk about food. We talk about movement. We talk about body love. We talk about how you got to clean up your past and all those thoughts like we’ve been talking about that we had growing up. They can’t live in your head anymore if you want to have, you know, a body positive life.

Speaker #0
Okay. Is there anything else, any takeaways that you want to give my audience or? I know where they can find you right on your website. And I will link that into my show notes so they can check you out.

Speaker #1
I didn’t realize that until yesterday I had not made the, made the change on pod match. So even though it says Rachel lab and fitness, it’ll still take you to my new website, but I am now Rachel lab and wellness, and you can find me on Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, and then my website all under Rachel lab and wellness. And then my book is on Amazon, of course. And what I would love to leave your listeners with is you’re not alone. I just really love to push that message. You’re not alone.

Speaker #0
I absolutely love that. I think that is so important to know that we are not living on our own island of confusion about food, confusion about our bodies. and… whether or not our bodies are normal or not. But to feel like you’re not alone is just is everything. Rachel, thank you so much. This has been a fantastic talk. And let’s keep the messages going.

Speaker #1
Yes, please. Well, thank you, Heather. I had the loveliest time today.

Speaker #0
Great. I did as well. And as always, if you loved this podcast, please consider gifting me with a five-star review. It is so helpful for me to get the word out on real eating, our real bodies, and real food stories. Thank you so much and have a great week. Bye for now.